How to make your boss believe you’re in office?
Sure you can’t get away with these
tactics on a daily basis, but if used judiciously they can help you help you
loaf around at your company’s expense without ever getting caught.
Work late everyday
Build a reputation of being a
tireless worker and no one will dare question your commitment to the company. Start
sending some midnight emails. This sure shot sign of robotic dedication will
make your bosses and colleagues think that you are…well, a robot. By doing this
you will set new standards in commitment, and will be requested by your
superiors to give pep talks to your team members. Plan ahead on the drivel you
will fill their heads with because you certainly don’t want to tell them the real
secret that drives you to work late and send emails at three in the morning.
The secret
tactic: Once you have written a bunch of
messages, set email timers and Outlook will deliver them exactly when you want.
An iDea can change your life
You can be out watching a movie and
have the rest of the world believe that you are slogging off your backside in
front of your PC. Obviously emails sent from your iPhone or blackberry can help
you achieve this. The only niggle is the ‘sent from blackberry/iPhone’ footer
which will give away your entire game.
The secret
tactic: Reconfigure your handheld and
disable the auto-signature feature, so that your emails appear to come straight
out of your desktop.
Manage your Instant Messenger
Given the fact that you’re always
hard at work and want no one to question you about your whereabouts (get it?),
you will have to turn your instant messenger into an alibi.
The (not so)
secret tactic: Either disable your messenger’s
‘idle’ setting or change the status message to ‘Really busy, don’t disturb’
giving plausible reasons why you don’t have time to participate in a petty
chatter.
Set the Scene
Meeting a hot gal for coffee (and
more) during work time and don’t want your colleagues (and bosses) to go
sniffing around for you?
Secret Tactic: Simply swing by your office in the morning and make your
presence felt by greeting everyone, especially those you’re answerable to. Then
turn on your PC, throw your jacket over your chair and place a semi filled cup
of coffee on your desk. Then creep out of your cubicle as inconspicuously as
possible. For the rest of the day, colleagues (and bosses) will think you've
just stepped out.
|