Employee abuse is common and unreported in many organisation. This will hamper and lower the productivity level among the employees. Section which is more prone towards the employee abuse is Sales and specially the sales driven organisation.

To stop employee abue the easiest and best thing to do is change jobs. If you have good, rational reasons for staying, you must begin by following all your company's procedures for resolving problems, which, no doubt, start with trying to work things out with your abuser.

Abuse has nothing to do with reason, so don't fool yourself that you can change an abuser by reasoning with him. However, this step serves two important purposes: a) What you perceive as abuse may be genuine misunderstandings between you and your boss that you can work out; and b) everyone you go to for help will want to know what you have done to try to resolve the problems and you must be able to report that you have done everything you could.

Learn the game. Mental abuse is a vicious mind game and if you don't want to leave the field, you have to play. You don't have to destroy your opponent to win the game, so don't waste your time and stress figuring out how to "get him". You win when you stop being abused--when you are no longer a victim--which means you win even if you quit, and you can quit any time you want to.

Play the game your way. Here are a few ideas that might help you win right where you are. If not, they can make your life a little easier while you prepare for the big game:

• Be the classy one in the joint; don't let your anger rule; think before dealing with your abuser; act, rather than react to her put-downs. If she accuses you of something you didn't do, state your case and leave it at that. Bullies love it when you get defensive, because they see you as helpless, which means they have control, so don't encourage her by giving her that satisfaction.
• If you don't handle stress well, learn how from a mental health pro, book, or friend, or take a class.
• Try not to confront or aggravate her in a way that could get you fired. You want control over whether or not you leave and when, and under what circumstances, preferably after you've found a better job. Also you want to be able to say you quit whenever the subject comes up.
• When a bully can hurt you, she is in charge. When you don't let her hurt you, you are in charge. When she calls the shots about when to put you down or falsely accuse you, or whatever it is she does, she has control. When you refuse to fight or accept her put-downs, you have control.
• Don't retaliate. Above all, keep your record clean and do the very best work you can. Don't give your abuser anything to work with when she has to explain her behavior to someone and tries to excuse it as necessary discipline or constructive criticism.
• Remember this: People tend not to empathize with "sinners who throw stones", and empathy could come in handy before this is over.

By Priti Shah

Laurent & Benon Management Consultants Ltd, a public limited company with its corporate office Gurgaon with Pan-India presence. We as an organization strive to offer the right Human Resource Solutions at the right time and enable our clients to enhance the net worth of their human resource capital.

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