I was in talking to a colleague the other day and she spoke to me of God and how he will bring salvation to everyone’s lives for they who seek him.

She used verse from the bible and she believed what she thought as the right path to follow - for all to follow.

She followed the path of prayers and listened to the priest preach on many occasions, for many years. I was just wondering is it because she needed to find God because her father passed away a few years ago and her Mother last year after suffering from paralysis for a very long time?

Did the Church inspire her to knock on their doors after she made multiple wrong investments or was it her futile efforts in searching for a man of God to marry but she said it’s difficult to find.

Why do we seek God? Did the creator create us, only for us to run around seeking him? Or did he create us, for us to seek ourselves to find who we are, and to find happiness in the world he created for us. What she needed was to find her self; she needed to find happiness from all the years of suffering.

I knew of a another woman who drifted from one bad relationship to another and every time she introduces the new man in her life she said “he is the one, my soul mate” and after a couple of months she was clawing him with her vicious verbal venom.

I told her she can’t drift from one relationship to another and tell the world I am searching for love. It seems finding a man was not really difficult for her, it’s her choice of men that she went out with was the issue. She needed to know what she really wanted out of the relationship.

After three failed marriages and a couple of broken relationship she still trying hard for that “ONE” guess he won’t be coming knocking her door soon.

Now, since I had been talking about the whole world but my self, here is my story. I was in an 8 relationship and thought she was the one I would marry and raise a family with her one day.

I would work hard toward this dream, which seemed so real at the time. But she had others things in mind. She wanted a rich life and the extravagance of the rich and famous. She would demand and I would try to give in, until I just gave up. We broke up and I broke down. I left my job and started to write and kept writing for hours, days, weeks and finally for 7 months, until I finished a novel. When it got published, I was in no pain anymore.

It seemed like I didn’t want the world to see me in pain and I wanted to rid of it on my own, for me to write was the only way out. I kind of grew up and realized that at the time of my pain my silent cries to God and her, brought no relief, nor did God speak to me nor did she pick my phone.

What spoke to me was me my inner me. We picked the pieces of my life and joined them together. I believe that if we find ourselves we won’t need to look for someone to find it for us.

A great saying from an infamous man who once said “never beg for support from others, stand alone and face life as a race, then everyone will follow you.”