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Adios IPL.But G'bye Modi? No chance!!!!!
Just when we thought it was all over.... khel khatam..... that the IPL
circus ended with fireworks lighting up the sky after that clumsy
defeat of the Mumbai Indians..... guess what? The real fireworks
started.... Lalit Modi's fiery 'farewell' address turned out to be an
open invitation to a Kusti match - and he wanted the "people of India'
to be the jury. Why not? Indians are pretty smart. They definitely
enjoyed the masala matches. And they know the IPL would not have taken
off without Modi. But does that mean " the people of India'' are not
bothered about getting to the bottom of this sleazy affair? If Modi has
done no wrong - let it be proved. And if he has - let that be proved,
too.
But if you are asking me whether heads will roll? Are you kidding?
The Commonwealth Games are next. The money making machines are already in overdrive.
No questions are being asked.
There is hardly any accountability.
And yes , big ticket politicians are involved.
The party never ends in apna desh.
****************
This appeared in Bombay Times today....
We will miss…. the IPL Gal Pals!
Now that it’s over – can we please get on with our lives?? Errr…. do we even want to? The better team has won, and let’s not spoil the moment by discussing who fixed what, and who made more money. At least for those few exhilarating weeks, millions of cricket lovers had a great time watching some heart stopping action, and rooting for their favourites…. and the bestest part?Often without leaving home! But for those following the million dollar ( literally!) masala scandals that really made this IPL the top rated reality show across channels, the lull to follow is going to be dull indeed! Us voyeurs had gotten used to our daily fix featuring a yummy platter of bite sized gossip, with amazing quotable quotes that really rocked! The word ‘slut’ suddenly became kosher! Everybody was throwing it around with total abandon, even Supriya Sule who said something about not ‘slutting out’ children by dragging them into this mess. Pushkar Ma’am also insisted she was no slut and that the wicked media was conducting a witch hunt and damning a respectable, female professional – her! Soon, two other young and attractive lassies hit the headlines – Laila Mahmood and Poorna Patel. While they avoided the ‘s-word’, they provided some more eye candy and an interesting youth angle. Amazing how competently these two young ladies navigated those shark infested waters without once losing their cool. While the likes of Jayanthi Natarajan fumed and hyper ventilated on nightly panel discussions, often completely ( and crudely) drowning out what the others were saying , these two PYTs were totally chilled out even as people around them went ballistic hurling all sorts of accusations at them.It’s called impeccable training. Let’s leave it at that.
But what do we do now? Breaking News is a nasty addiction. We have been spoilt after those two terrific media bombs exploding on our small screens back to back ( forgotten ‘Shonia’ already? ). Without the excitement of anticipating the next dhamaka, viewers are likely to get impatient and bored. Bhajji’s many fans now want him to perform off the field and preferably in public – he can pick his act. He is a made-for-television person, capable of providing hours of mouth watering titillation. He understands front page photo- ops better than anybody else on the team – and happily plays to the galleries. If people are a bit sick of Siddhuisms ( he has run through his repertoire ), maybe it’s time to rope in Harbhajan Singh. Throw him into the same frame with the old, saucy, sexy Mandira Bedi ( let’s face it, the day she gave up those noodle straps, cut her hair, lost her curves , and stopped giggling,was the day she surrendered her USP) and watch the two sizzle. There is something awfully sexy about observing women in traditional testosterone pumping sports ( Sandra Bullock in ‘The Blind Side’ ) that makes viewers go weak in the knees. Besides, nobody takes any of this seriously anyway – let’s face it, Mandira was not hired for her cricketing knowledge…. and by the same token, Boria Mazumdar is not expected to wear noodle straps. But going by the numbers, the presence of gorgeous gal pals in the IPL has certainly added oomph value to the game. And here, I include the super glamourous team owners ( take a bow, Preity, Shilpa… and yes, you above all, Nita!), besides wives and girlfriends within camera range ( Gouri and her girl gang ). There was as much to ogle in the stands and at the notorious IPL after parties ( Poorna’s brainchild), as the fast paced action on the field. Insiders would say, what went on post-match was far more hectic and exciting than all those run outs and sixers the public was treated to ( consolation prize, guys!).
Ab kya hoga?
Come on, Bollywood. Get into fifth gear. Give India something to drool over. We are counting on Hritik and Barbara to add some sizzle to the long, hot summer ahead. And no kite flying this time. The real thing, or nothing. Okay??
But if you are asking me whether heads will roll? Are you kidding?
The Commonwealth Games are next. The money making machines are already in overdrive.
No questions are being asked.
There is hardly any accountability.
And yes , big ticket politicians are involved.
The party never ends in apna desh.
****************
This appeared in Bombay Times today....
We will miss…. the IPL Gal Pals!
Now that it’s over – can we please get on with our lives?? Errr…. do we even want to? The better team has won, and let’s not spoil the moment by discussing who fixed what, and who made more money. At least for those few exhilarating weeks, millions of cricket lovers had a great time watching some heart stopping action, and rooting for their favourites…. and the bestest part?Often without leaving home! But for those following the million dollar ( literally!) masala scandals that really made this IPL the top rated reality show across channels, the lull to follow is going to be dull indeed! Us voyeurs had gotten used to our daily fix featuring a yummy platter of bite sized gossip, with amazing quotable quotes that really rocked! The word ‘slut’ suddenly became kosher! Everybody was throwing it around with total abandon, even Supriya Sule who said something about not ‘slutting out’ children by dragging them into this mess. Pushkar Ma’am also insisted she was no slut and that the wicked media was conducting a witch hunt and damning a respectable, female professional – her! Soon, two other young and attractive lassies hit the headlines – Laila Mahmood and Poorna Patel. While they avoided the ‘s-word’, they provided some more eye candy and an interesting youth angle. Amazing how competently these two young ladies navigated those shark infested waters without once losing their cool. While the likes of Jayanthi Natarajan fumed and hyper ventilated on nightly panel discussions, often completely ( and crudely) drowning out what the others were saying , these two PYTs were totally chilled out even as people around them went ballistic hurling all sorts of accusations at them.It’s called impeccable training. Let’s leave it at that.
But what do we do now? Breaking News is a nasty addiction. We have been spoilt after those two terrific media bombs exploding on our small screens back to back ( forgotten ‘Shonia’ already? ). Without the excitement of anticipating the next dhamaka, viewers are likely to get impatient and bored. Bhajji’s many fans now want him to perform off the field and preferably in public – he can pick his act. He is a made-for-television person, capable of providing hours of mouth watering titillation. He understands front page photo- ops better than anybody else on the team – and happily plays to the galleries. If people are a bit sick of Siddhuisms ( he has run through his repertoire ), maybe it’s time to rope in Harbhajan Singh. Throw him into the same frame with the old, saucy, sexy Mandira Bedi ( let’s face it, the day she gave up those noodle straps, cut her hair, lost her curves , and stopped giggling,was the day she surrendered her USP) and watch the two sizzle. There is something awfully sexy about observing women in traditional testosterone pumping sports ( Sandra Bullock in ‘The Blind Side’ ) that makes viewers go weak in the knees. Besides, nobody takes any of this seriously anyway – let’s face it, Mandira was not hired for her cricketing knowledge…. and by the same token, Boria Mazumdar is not expected to wear noodle straps. But going by the numbers, the presence of gorgeous gal pals in the IPL has certainly added oomph value to the game. And here, I include the super glamourous team owners ( take a bow, Preity, Shilpa… and yes, you above all, Nita!), besides wives and girlfriends within camera range ( Gouri and her girl gang ). There was as much to ogle in the stands and at the notorious IPL after parties ( Poorna’s brainchild), as the fast paced action on the field. Insiders would say, what went on post-match was far more hectic and exciting than all those run outs and sixers the public was treated to ( consolation prize, guys!).
Ab kya hoga?
Come on, Bollywood. Get into fifth gear. Give India something to drool over. We are counting on Hritik and Barbara to add some sizzle to the long, hot summer ahead. And no kite flying this time. The real thing, or nothing. Okay??
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