Kaho Na Pyaar Hai….
Will Brand Rahul add up to Brand India??

The startling election results ( even Singh is King’s characteristically expressionless face registered shock and awe ) certainly make one believe that India has fallen in love with the Dimpled Darling and all that he stands for ( don’t embarrass me by asking for specifics – I am as clueless as his countless besotted admirers). The euphoria continues unabated seven days after the verdict, as fawning Congressmen go on and on about “Rahulji’, and how it has been a vote for growth and development. Rahulji meanwhile , is sticking to his self-effacing, low profile “ I’m just a regular bloke doing my job’’ demeanour, leaving Mummyji to beam broadly and project a voter-friendly vibe on camera. The biggest problem with this election and the mandate given to the Congress party is that Brand India has been usurped by Brand Rahul. Not his fault at all – but we have always been a nation in search of idols to worship. Our intrinsic sycophantic nature demands that we find such persons and immediately assume our favourite stance – lying prostrate in the presence of demi-Gods.We enjoy lying supine at our icons’ feet. Sashtaang namaskar, anyone? Genuflecting comes easier than standing tall, head held high. This became vividly evident post-victory, when thousands of Congress party loyalists showed up with banners and fireworks to anoint the Prince. And wonder of wonders, even an asli erstwhile maharajah ( Jyotiraditya) was heard singing hosannahs to ‘Rahulji’ ( overnight promotion from plain Rahul to Rahulji - colleague to boss?). This is just the way we are. So be it. Perhaps it is a peculiarly Asian trait to deify leaders in an absurdly exaggerated manner. But to witness the shameless, full on chamchagiri on display was just too cringe making, to put it mildly.
What next? We have our Magic Mantra in place ( “ Youth rocks, okay?”), and we also have the oldie goldies holding the fort and sticking to the status quo. Portfolios are being judiciously distributed keeping all the delicate equations in mind. While writing this, the wheeling and dealing is still on, and the Manmohan-Sonia combo is playing hard ball with the likes of Karunanidhi and gang. From the looks of it, Manmohan has not fallen hook , line and sinker for a Babalog cabinet, and there are still enough really, really senior citizens around to warrant the deployment of a few rocking chairs in parliament. If Young India was hoping for dishy designer politicians dominating parliamentary proceedings, there may be a mild disappointment in store. Hot blooded ‘Jaawani Deewani’ is still to replace the silver haired sobriety of the old war horses. For those who were hell bent on sending veteran politicians off to the nearest Naana-Naani Park, that’s not about to happen in a hurry, either. Given the heavy duty haggling taking place in Delhi, it will be interesting to monitor how the total adds up finally, once the laddoos – sorry, portfolios - have been distributed.
For those of you old enough to recall the lyrics of ‘Theme for a Dream’ ( Cliff Richards), this is the song to be singing right now. A Dream Team is possible, now more than ever, provided Singh and Sonia stay determined and tough. At the end of the day, it is worth considering what this win implies. It has been a vote against several touchy issues ( fundamentalism, regionalism, castesism) that were causing concern across India. It is seen as a vote for the ‘basics’ that every Indian is entitled to – roti, kapda aur makaan. Frankly, there are no other ideological issues involved this time. No philosophical dialogues, no intellectual debate. People want a better quality of life than the abject wretchedness that has been their fate thus far. They want a shot at improving their future through education , jobs and opportunities. It’ s obvious the vote has been vehemently against narrow- minded regional politics that are dangerous and far from inclusive. In such a scenario, the new leadership is obliged to deliver on promises made during the campaign. ‘Rahulji’ obviously got a sanitized taste of the real India, when he was air- dropped into villages and chose to spend the night huddled on a charpoy, in the humble abodes of the poorest of the poor. A crash course in garibi, as it were, which galvanized him into ‘hataaoing’ it. To be fair to him, perhaps this really was the turning point. Maybe his discovery of India began with sharing a roti with a disenfranchised villager living in the back of the beyond in Orissa. It can happen…Rahul sounds sufficiently sincere when he constantly harps on growth and development. His timing has been impeccable so far, and his brand positioning cannot be improved upon. He has single handedly steered a tired, old party to victory and injected fresh blood into the team. This blood transfusion was long overdue. As the BJP has discovered, much to its horror.
For all of L.K.Advani’s many virtues, the one thing he could not reverse is age. Youth can be cruel, unforgiving and impatient when it comes to passing judgements. Short term memory loss is another affliction that strikes people under-thirty. There is little introspection and even less tolerance…. forget about a feel for history. Clearly Youth India preferred to throw in its lot with Rahul and Friends. One can almost hear those over- enthu pub- goers chorus , “Yo man…. Rahul rocks!” while bumping clenched fists, Rapper- style. That’s New India – the one the others failed to recognize. They are done with the ghaasa peeta, puraana ishtyle of manipulating voters and exploiting the politics of hate. On one level, the much awaited change of guard is welcome. On another, we seem in too much of a hurry to hand over the country to absolute greenhorns who may lack the required maturity to deal with global issues… or even national ones, for that matter. Well. for better or worse, we have opted for a Fair & Lovely young leader. All that is required to complete the picture now is a Balika Bodhu. The most important question still remains unanswered : Will Brand Rahul add up to Brand India?? Do we have a choice but to wait and watch??

This appeared in Hindustan Times this morning.

The Jaipur heat took its toll - I was laid up in bed all of yesterday, dehydrated and unable to move! The enforced rest did me a world of good. I wished I had got Mita to pack some of her yummy kebabs (smoked over charcoal, and delicately flavoured with rose petals plus crushed ilaichi - heavenly!) in a doggy bag. Instead, I stuffed myself with Bong-style khichdi prepared by our loyal cook Anil...... and slept soundly on a really, really full tum-tum.

I dreamt of Bhaichang Bhutia. It is an omen. I hope the guy wins his dance contest. He deserves to. But then again, Gauhar Khan has displayed as much sincerity, tenacity and talent. Who says it is a fair world??

G'Bye Lantern Jaw ( Jay Leno). I was never an addict of the show, so I don't get it. The slot has changed. He ain't dead. Relax all you Leno fans. Just retune your bio rhythms to 10pm. Big deal.

Will be leaving for the India Se Singapore Lit Fest next week. Strictly no laptop. I'll try and compensate for the missing posts by writing Dil Se before jumping on that plane. Just thought I should keep you guys in the loop. Remember.... I miss you as much as.... as.... you miss me??? Ha ha.

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