Sujoy Ghosh my director on ‘Aladin’ sent me the final tracks for the film and after an extremely long interval I put on my headphones to listen to them to download them on to iTunes and to transfer them on the iPod. These are works that we have been involved in during the making of the film. They are songs that we sung together and constructed them during long and late hours in the neat and efficient studio of Vishal and Shekhar, that young and dynamic duo music directors. We lived with them on the sets for days during the time when we filmed them. Danced to them, enacted along with them, through heat and cold, through rehearsals and retakes.

Yet sitting here distant and far from home, when you listen to the music from the film, it creates a nostalgia that you wish to remain with for a lot longer than you would perhaps have in normal circumstances. You repeat them again and again. You search for the acts that you performed during the making. You strain to hear every instrument that plays along with each track as it digitally unfolds. You begin to like it all over again. And then sets in the imagination. You imagine the reaction of your people when they shall hear it for the first time. You picture the premier of the film, the red/green carpet, the guests and invitees, the buzz in the foyer, the theatre ambience and finally the moment when the film starts and all that work you put in, projects, to either applause or rejection.

Right now sitting here in far off land those moments of making bring on nostalgia. Once in the proximity of home and in the midst of the finished work one wonders where all that nostalgia disappears to. Its now more on how and whether, others related to it or not. Its now more on wanting to get inputs from friends and well wishers, from the masses and the people. There is apprehension and uncertainty that rules above all else. Invited guests still bear some responsibility of getting their ethics right - they encourage and compliment as they face you, debase it as they get into the privacy of their car. Some text messages arrive, some do not, and a general idea of what people thought of it starts to unfold. Some late night calls shall come in, some the next morning. At times none of it happens at all !!

But nothing… nothing comes anywhere close to what you felt as you reviewed the product in the quiet and solitary presence of yourself. Nothing and nobody shall be able to replace the sentiment of that one moment when you sat by yourself and by your creativity. Nothing.

And so I say to myself today. Let me be with my moment, absorb it the way I wish to, live and imagine its presence in the way we expected it to and remain satiated with its wonders. For tomorrow as it goes out into the world it was meant to go out to, we may never be able to enjoy it with as great a zeal as we do now.

When it succeeds, you humble yourself in its popular acceptance. When it fails you suffer the indifference and disdain. But in either condition, you never are able to relive the moment of isolated pleasure, much before it went out to the mass.

Many an important actor in the field of cinema, stepping out with their first ever effort, have in utmost honesty walked out the night before of their release and visited their most intimate friends and confided, that come the morning, he will become public property, unable to live up to the relationship they enjoyed together, earlier. Its like the bachelor party night prior to the wedding, a last fling as it were with the boys, before their place was taken up by the better half !!

Is that really why it happens ? What is the history, or if at all, the culture behind this age old practice ? Must look it up someday or perhaps the enlightened geniuses of our FmXt shall throw some light on it ! But within my limited resource and knowledge its a night to celebrate the last day of freedom for the man, for in the morning of the following day, he shall swear himself through religious and official protocol, to be the lawfully wedded husband of his wife and life time partner.

Goodness !! Look where we started off and how we have landed up into the matrimonial columns of our existence. This is magical. It is the magic of the straying mind. A mind that reflects and images so many diverse thoughts and feels, within its complicated confines. Almost like the magical lamp of Aladin, coz’ that is how it all began ! And many a cynical mind shall construe how brilliant a gimmick I have woven into the POST of the DAY, by promoting my film.

“Mr Bachchan, I think you are a genius ! Look how blatantly you have camouflaged talk about your film for its publicity !”

And Mr Bachchan replies ~

“Actually Madam, how right you are. I am indeed a genius … er.. in the film .. come and see it … my character is called Genius .. you know … Aladin … the magical lamp .. and the Genie … so Genie … GENIUS !!” Smart eh ?? Heh, heh heh. Ok thats one ‘heh’ too many ! Sorry !!

Alright ! Need to hit the pillow and the remote and the protein drink, for, tomorrow is a sudden early call. Its the magazine GQ and they come over all the way to do a cover photograph and an expected interview. They honor some of us from India with an Award for our excellence to our profession on the 27th September in Mumbai and your family head, Mr Amitabh Bachchan heavily promoting film Aladin on blog, has been chosen as one of them.

Ya ok yes yes thank you .. ya no big deal.. yes yes YES !!! ..

Good night !!

I hold your hand, each one of you, embrace you warmly till my perfume becomes overbearing … and slip away …

Amitabh Bachchan