The GQ honors me with a Lifetime of Achievement and at an efficiently organized evening among the most distinguished audience, gives me the pleasure of sharing space among some very talented and deserving luminaries of the country. Unlike most other award functions this one had a class and temper not often witnessed in the city. The routine on stage was short, clipped to the point and smoothly executed. Politicians to businessmen to sports, literature, entertainment and environment, all were decorated. Each one of them was gracious and eloquent, except yours truly. I just thanked the magazine and saying I have a lot more to say, directed them to my blog at bigb.bigadda.com…

Everyone thought it was smart. But at 2 AM as I attempt to live out the night, I realize that maybe it was not such a smart idea after all.

Familiar faces, not so familiar faces, faces often seen and met, faces not so often seen and met, faces seen but not met, and met but not seen enough. It is always such a bustle that registering one and not the other is often taken by the other as a statement of arrogance, disapproval and plain rude behavior. Such occasions generally are an acute exercise in how well one manages to be able to do just that. Reflex time is short. Greeting one, while 20 others seek attention and notice can become unsettling, but one that needs to be capably handled. Most conversation is for the sake of conversation. Nothing gets registered, other than the air kisses and the frequent smiles of approval. You nod in approval or disapproval alternately and hope the correct nod synchronized with the correct expression. You want to give the impression that you are indeed listening attentively, but the eyes and attention keeps drifting aimlessly. Its a ready made situation for cinema actually and someone must explore this for their next venture.

But seriously though, it was a very well balanced invite. It was lovely to meet up with Dr Pachauri, the gentleman who’s company won the Nobel Peace Prize on environment. We have been committed to his Light a Billion Lamps campaign, apart from what we have been doing together on the warming of the planet. Leander Paes, who was watched closely over the USOpen just a short while ago, spends some time with me narrating a story he has been offered as an actor and seeks inside information on what the Industry is really all about. Vishal Bharadwaj is generous in his speech about success being a branch that breaks easily, but exempts me from his example, and I wonder why. Katrina stabs a ‘hey its me’ finger punch on my shoulder and we recollect old times. The time of her very first film, BOOM and how as a shy reticent girl she had been bullied by the director not to ever look into the monitor. She was new and uncertain like most of us, but was keen to see what she looked like on screen. I thought it was a most natural and common desire and one that should have been allowed by the director, but when he did not express its possibility to the rest of the cast, I had dragged her to the monitor and given her the first look of what she looked like, to her. To her credit she still remembers that moment. Later as the film shoot in Dubai came to an end, I had invited all cast and crew to tour the city at night and to perhaps have a bite somewhere. I recollect the embarrassment she and all of us faced when she was stopped from going inside a club, because the man in charge of the door thought her to be underage. And now from a small insignificant part in ‘Sarkar’ to the most Googled and popular star in the firmament, Ms Kaif has come such a long way in such a short time. Saif and Kareena I met back stage as we were either coming up to receive or coming down after. That Saif wore glasses gave me sufficient reason to be comfortable with my own. Shobha De discussed with me the absolute joy of blogging and how we were drawn to it almost religiously and that we had not had a spat on the blog for a while and that in keeping with healthy tenets we should soon…

Sweet !!

Irfan Khan, that understated yet most effective actor, and I spent time together. I love the way he performs, not just in films but in commercials too and told him so. That phone call from the phone booth before he gets the heart attack in ‘Namesake’, is a masterpiece. His cool and casual appearances in the brand advertisements have been emulated on many an occasion. He talks of ‘Muqqadar ka Sikander’ I talk of his acts and we separate.

Rewards and awards are great tools for the celebration of excellence, in the eyes of the other. In our eyes though we know our own true worth and what needs to be done to be worthy of the recognition that comes our way.

May HE in his divine abode look upon us with compassion -

Amitabh Bachchan