It is not always the best of times to write when the brain is sluggish. When it takes time to think, to compose, to interpret and relate. It is also not the best of times to pass opinion and thought, to comment. For, it is then that words though meant in earnest find themselves in a web that interprets quite the opposite in the minds of others ….

The ‘bachchas’ left early in the morning and it is always a sad sight to see them get their blessings after the customary ‘tika’ before travel, and leave. A part of you leaves along with them, or a part of you leaves you so desolate and alone that it becomes difficult to cope. And until they are safely home a deep concern lingers for them. Once in life begins ot alter according to what is left behind.

One lot goes and another comes in. Abhishek landed back from Goa after his schedule with Ashutosh and once again the house seems full and amiable. The four of us are together after a long gap and there is much to talk and catch up on. Schedules change. The seating on the dining table changes. Shanook is out among us more - he being a dread for the kids had been kept away during the time they were here, from his favorite couch. The squeals of happy and mischievous banter dies down to a sombre feel. The staff becomes a little complacent and moves at 16 frames/sec. That is the tech for slow - motion !! The TV is back to news and the chocolate cookies and other immediate delicacies find another home.

Kids - they are a boon to any situation. We all miss them severely !!

Most of the day is spent with TV. Promotions for ‘Teen Patti’ for TV. Still photographs for a prospective business proposal which could eventually find themselves on TV. Modules for promotion of the ‘Colors’ channel, now opening up in the UK and USA and then finally by the evening, an Awards ceremony - Apsara Awards by the Guild of the professional world. Many old industry friends meet up. Akshay Kumar elaborates his association with me over the years. The films and other associations yes, but also a gentle tale on his first meeting with me as a six year old prodded by his father to get my autograph, as we sit in the cold and pleasant environs of Srinagar in Kashmir. Of the grapes that lay beside me on the table and his interest more in the grapes than the actual illness. He announces this as I get up to receive my Life Time Achievement award, embarrassed and humbled by the description of my qualities as a professional and more as a human, as a friend. It is a large gathering at the venue tonight and an immensely well represented fraternity turns up. After the reward, interviews for the media back stage and then before leaving we gather together in Shahrukh’s van-home, Jaya Abhishek Aishwarya and I to hang out, chat as the event comes to an end. The three then leave for home and I leave for the Screen Awards venue to rehearse again for the Teen Patti promotion at the awards - a performance as part of the event tomorrow evening.

As I wait for my turn to come for rehearsal I catch up on conversation with Saif as Kareena does her number on stage. He had been out of the country for the premiere of Paa, for which I had invited both of them and he regrets not being there and I wish for him to see the film sometime. He talks of his very keen interest in his next project ‘Agent Vinod’ and I take him back to New Delhi and his grandmother and her sports convertible E - Type white Jaguar, which she drove herself into the Teen Murti House, the official residence of the first Prime Minister of India, Pt Jawaharlal Nehru . We being jaw dropping spectators inside the House on many occasions as she regally drove in. Begum Pataudi, mother to Tiger Pataudi, father to Saif, strong and graceful in demeanor. Can never forget that image.

And then just as it had started it ends. I drive home to a full dining table - Amaan and Ayaan Ali sons of Ustad Amjad Ali Khan that sarod maestro, and friends of the family from when they were 4-5 years of age, and the ever effervescent Preity Zinta over for dinner. And PeeZee, the non stop talking machine, having us all in splits on her narration of various events in her recent life. She and Jaya shared a most maternal instinct relationship during the making of ‘Kal Ho Na Ho’ and have maintained it since. Its almost a Mother daughter thing.

I shall be needing to, as always, seeking information and advice from my dearest FmXt and so soon I shall be putting across a few queries for your consideration. Ya.. ?

Ok …

Of this later …

First …. good night, shubratri, shabbakhair …

Amitabh Bachchan