My Mothers death Anniversary today, the 21 st of December … she breathes each day within us, blesses us from her abode, guides and teaches us each day what it meant to be under her wing and care, strengthens us with her will and her nerve of never ever giving up. Even in the greatest of disappointments her warmth and courage instilled hope and life in our despondent conditions. I wonder where she got it from ? She lost her own Mother when she was just a few weeks old .. who gave her this spirit and teaching ? Wherefrom did she imbibe what she gave to us, and how did she ever discover that what she gave was right !!

We don’t call them Mother’s for nothing !!

And to day another Award for me – the Maharashtrian of the Year, a Maanbindu, from no less a person than the President of the Country, the respected and honorable Shrimati Pratibha Patil. So grateful and humbled. The Award given by the very popular Marathi paper ‘Lokmat’. Dilip Saheb, Dilip Kumar gets one too for his life achievements, and there are many other prominent Maharashtrian achievers in the field of Science, Literature, Social Service, Art, Politics that get rewarded.

I have spent 3/4ths of my life in this city of Mumbai, Maharashtra – 42 years ! And all that I have received in life apart from my parents and my education have come to me from this golden land. Name, fame, honor, recognition, home and family, children and children of children, everything indebted to the city and state for making me whatever I am today ! My obeisance to this great city and its people, for giving me all that I have with me today.

I feel honored too when the media quotes what I express on this post. They carry with prominence what my thoughts are and I feel that what I share with my Ef gets recognized by them as well. This is humbling.

But as I said the day has been in the thoughts of my Mother. She loved charity, and so in the morning, the very needy leprosy home that we have been attached with, was asked what they needed most, and once said, it was provided to them after the blessings of my Mother were taken. The joy of giving can never be replaced by any other joy. The satisfaction of providing is as close to fulfillment of prayer as any other.

My visits to the same hospital where she breathed her last, today, bring back memories and moments spent in grief and despair to see her struggling body fight till the very end. My visits are for other relatives in distress, but I cannot but sense the time in the morning when we all stood helpless in front of the varied machines that worked endlessly assisted by a team of sincere doctors hovering over her limp and stricken body, in an attempt to revive her…..

Too much to go back to .. I must come away from that visual, close my eyes and numb my senses ..

Let us talk and think of the other .. the good night that awaits us ..

Love and more ..

Amitabh Bachchan