As I scan through the comments of the Blog today, I am overwhelmed by the sincerity of thought, the delicacy of expression and the warmth of affection that has been poured onto the millions of words flowing out towards the legacy of my Father, his life, his contribution and in particular his worth not just for me, but all that he left behind. My words of gratitude shall befall a terrible vacuum if I were to attempt to express them, but I must acknowledge the graciousness with which each one of you have provided solace to me in the various ways that you have. What a wonderful word devised by the English tongue – thank you ! Simple and meaningful without any alternative. This and the other – sorry !!

I realize that if I were to even attempt putting together something of relevance as far as a dedication to my Father was concerned, I would fail miserably. But all of you have surpassed that which even I could not imagine or think of. There is such a deep sense of togetherness within us. A sense of being one, to stand by, to assist, to encourage, pray, deliver, that which sometimes near and dear ones fail to accomplish. No one asked you for it and neither did any one ever compel it upon you. You did it on your own feel, instinct and desire. No obligations, no return benefits sought, just a genuine human feel of doing what needs to be done – at times even more than that …

Where does all this come from ? When I with pride describe to those that are not acquainted with our world, they express cynically the fruitless endeavor that I indulge in. They make a mistake. It is not an endeavor at all. It is one that builds on its own strength and exists and flourishes. No one taught the other. No one gave any incentive. Nothing was forced or conditional. It just built itself independently.

Such independence can never be built if there was not a sense of deliberation. Of want, of commitment. The beauty of its execution puzzles the world that lives in tattered circumstances. Tattered not in terms of poverty or in a description that envelops lesser means, but in a sense of their own scattered thoughts – irreverent and so full of their own misfortune of not being able, or should I say capable, of creating this wonderful universe !

I love such that describe us in baser means. I love their abuse and dislike. For in doing so, they so clearly demonstrate that they are incapable and inefficient in accomplishing what we have accomplished. It is a genuine example of what they lack and what we possess, when they throw unadulterated bumff at us. It delights me that they do. I wish they would do it more often – it measures our success when they do !!!

I am approached by a music company of repute. They wish for me to record for them my Father’s works all over again. They have the rights to one that we did, my Father and me, many years ago – Bachchan recites Bachchan ! Now they wish me to sing some of his verse in my voice ! They present me with some gifts. And I am amazed what it is. It is the old style record vinyl LP player, along with some LP’s of my films. They tell me that this is what is being made popular by the generation next. The world has come round they say in full circle and I am most intrigued. When digital prevails at such rapid lengths to convert everything and all of it on to your mobile phone, I wonder how this old world charm has resurfaced and gaining popularity. So what … ? do we dig back our store house and extricate those discarded LP’s of yore. They say fashion repeats itself after some years, so if you have saved some of the clothes of the 70′s it is very likely that in a couple of years, spending for new latest designs would not be necessary ! I threw away an entire bunch of my old sunglasses and the kids could have killed me for it ! They are all back in fashion again. I met some friends of this generation at a social evening and they asked me where I had got those tinted glares I wore in DON. I told them they were my personal. They yippied and yupped about it, until I told them I had thrown them away. I was standing by a swimming pool when I said this and I could sense that had I not discreetly moved away from the scene of action, they would have taken the liberty of dumping me, fashion clothes and all, into the water. Boy, am I going to hang on to every piece of material that I possess, unless it is required by the old age home or the leprosy center that we support !

The night closes in. Traffic outside smoothens. The enterprising shall pull out their magnum bikes powered to the limit and roar down the streets. The sports models, low and aggressive looking, almost always inspired from the speeded animal species, shall most elegantly slither onto the main concourses and the almost with an expression of sudden freedom explode into the distance, leaving a few wide mouthed by standers, grabbing on to their clothing lest they loose them !

I shall now saunter down to my bed, warm my feet with the traditional and old world ‘hot water bottle’, perhaps catch a losing cricket game against the Ozzies and turn off the lights. My dreams these days are most vivid and of great intense visual value. But never strong enough to allow me their remembrance when I awake ! Strange, but sad too in a way.

The mobiles shall be put on charge next to me, an alarm for the morning gym shall be flashed and then after a thorough search as to which pillow shall be the coveted companion for the night … shut the eyes and hopefully the world !!

Time now ..

Amitabh Bachchan