I just had to write. Even at this unearthly hour. The thought of all the extended family waiting in anticipation of the post, is far more important than the much required sleep. A sleep which has been deprived for some time ..

The day has been one of a million interviews, back to back and non stop. It is the birthday season, the BB3 occasion, the completion of 40 years season and it would not have been proper to not give each media an opportunity. They have been kind and generous and celebratory ; each channel bringing their own cake and candles and their version of the birthday song to fill me with wishes and to fill my staff with tons of cake !! With each couple of interviews I have changed dress and location within the office just to give the media the benefit that it was not all done in one swift moment. And after it was all over the day ended up with the official release of the look of the film ‘RANN’ at the PVR theatre just behind the house.

This was some moment. A trailor of the film was projected on the screen and after its duration of 2 mins was over there was a thunderous applause from the media. This is unusual. They then asked for the trailor to be played again. Another unusual occurrence. Finally when it was all over we went down to the front to talk to the media, give our impressions of what the film was all about and take a few questions. But before that there was a surprise for me - another cake !! Only this time around it was presented by about 20 gentlemen, dressed in the character costumes of the various films I had worked in, but wearing masks of my face from particular film. It is always embarrassing to be confronted in situations like this and I do not know how I was able to keep my composure. The Q&A that followed was I believe one of the finest interactions that I may ever have had. And surprisingly, there was applause on the answers of the questions they asked.

It has been a wrong belief that ‘RANN’ is Ram Gopal Varma’s retaliation on media. It is nothing of the sort. Instead it is a most pro media story; one that takes up their cause in as stark a manner as possible. Its a delicate balance between business and conscience. Does the media compromise with their conscience to get the business right, or does it compromise with the business to get the conscience right. Will the media ever accept the fact that this is a story that prevails in every office of the fourth estate. No, not the story of ‘RANN’, but the very idea of making compromises with ones conscience. For this is where the truth that involves us all, prevails.

Many sms’s later I was back in Jalsa to receive the newly weds, well almost, driving down from near Nashik and then bringing in the birthday. A small group of family members and the like, sat over dinner discussing perhaps the mode of the publicity that should be attempted for PAA, should be attempted for other films on the anvil and to leave the rest to the way the fourth estate, would react. Two prominent scenes from ‘RANN’ were seen by me and inadvertently drew attention and debate. Enlightening !!

In the failing hours of dawn my mind functions at speeds that need to be pushed to move. And I do not have any desire to move or push. So let me retire with the thought that those that have given me their love and affection today has not gone waste. I reciprocate it by extending my most gracious wishes to all those that have taken the trouble of extending theirs to me. Tomorrow is another day another life that I may have the honor of living in and believing and I shall extend my time to meet them at whatever hour they may arrive. If it does not get out of control then there shall be occasion to meet those that shall come by. Those few that shall have made delicate gifts from delicate moments spent with me, or moments they imagined they have, will be an absolute joy to meet and a moment that shall not jeopardize the day of the moment, or vice versa.

It now rings close to 4:30 AM and it rings a bell to turn in for the night ..

Shubh Ratri ….

Amitabh Bachchan